A Tribute
Goodbye, my friend. You will be sorely missed.
We had some great times together. You were my rock. You were the one who understood that I didn't need to talk it out. The anticipation of when we would meet again was enough to keep me strong all day. It was you, Mr. Pepper, who got me through many a dark Post-Partum hour. You are my vice, and I've never been so sad to let a friend go.
I was true to you all my days. Always gave you the utmost respect. I never dared to drink you from a can. Only the fountain showcased your true taste. I knew this and respected that unspoken law. Your sweet carbonated rush is an addiction I've been chained to for far too long. My lips have never even dared touch your stepsister, known as Diet. No, my friend, I reserved all my love for you.
But no more. We must not see each other. No more stolen midnight drive-thru rendevous. No more cuddling on the couch with romantical movies. No more, you. Goodbye, my love. Godspeed.
P.S. In case you're wondering how my appointment went, I'm now officially diabetic and my thyroid's gone to hell.