Tonight we tried a new bedtime routine called "Put the younger kids in bed first because they need more sleep".
It did not go well.
First, Taylor had to come down the stairs and tell me that her hands weren't working right.
Then Daniel had to come down and tell me that Taylor was looking at him.
Then Taylor had to come and tell me that she wasn't looking at Daniel, she was looking at his monkey.
Then I had to go and turn off the light again.
Then Taylor had to come down and tell me that her head was hurting, and that there is a mean boy at school... except that she couldn't remember his name, and maybe it was a girl? Or maybe it was her teacher. Mostly, she just was sure that she couldn't go to sleep if people were going to be mean to her.
Then Taylor had to come down again, because she decided Daniel was being mean to her.
So Daniel had to come down and tell me that he wasn't being mean, he just accidentally looked at her.
Then Taylor had to remind us all that she never said you could look at her.
So Daniel reminded her that he never wanted to look at her stupid head.
Then Taylor said that Daniel's head was stupider.
And Daniel said, "NO IT NOT!"
And Taylor said, "UH HUH!"
And Daniel goes, "NUH UH!"
And then our Dad roared up the stairs "SHUT UP AND GET IN BED"
And then Daniel and Taylor had to talk about how mean Dad was.
And then Daniel remembered that he was hungry.
And Taylor remembered that she was thirsty.
And then I remembered what it was like a long time ago, when my kids were babies, and my house was silent and still from 6pm to 6am.
And then Taylor looked at Daniel again.
Rinse. Repeat. Times six.